June 14th, 2024 / µ

When I wrote my fiction last story, it dawned on me that when I write about stalking, I write from a point of knowledge, so to speak, that is rather extreme:

Eight years
Five addresses
Enormous group – more than 100 involved parties by now.
The group has moved across borders to continue its criminal activities, and it is linked to criminal groups in France.
No one will speak up, and no one will help in Denmark.
The police know everything (because I have reported it to them in writing to the extent it was possible) but refuse to act, ignoring my continuous communications - they have even refused to meet with me. So I stopped communicating and started thinking seriously outside the box, the box in which people I should have been able to depend on for help are located - indifferent, arrogant, and comfortable - and well, a solution presented itself.

Shaped By Experience

My point is that there are all sorts of stalkers. Even if they have their evil deeds in common, they are as different as people in general. Some stalk alone, and some stalk in groups, and their motives for their criminal behavior are also different, even if these motives fall into certain categories – revenge, delusion, infatuation, and so on.

The distinctions below show how experts classify various types of stalkers. Click on the link to the open-source article below to read more.

My personal experiences are with a pack of criminal, delusional, psychopathic, and sadistic monsters, or a combo of the categories 4 and 5, I would say. And I have become aware of how much my personal experiences with this group color and shape my writing.

One widely acknowledged classification posits stalking as a violent reaction to rejection, proposed by Mullen and colleagues (1999). They identify five stalker typologies:

The Rejected Typology: Stalking arises from the breakdown of a close, often sexual, relationship. The initial motive is reconciliation, potentially shifting quickly to revenge against the one who ended the relationship.
Intimacy Seeker Typology: This type targets strangers or acquaintances without prior emotional connections. Motivated by loneliness, the intimacy seeker believes in a connection with the person being stalked, irrespective of rejections.
The Incompetent Suitor Typology: Like the intimacy seeker, individuals in this category target strangers or acquaintances but don’t assume an existing or destined relationship. Their motivation is loneliness or sexual desire.
The Resentful Typology: Driven by a sense of mistreatment or victimization, these individuals seek revenge and justice, often collecting evidence of perceived injustices. Harassment by resentful stalkers tends to be prolonged.
The Predatory Typology: Constituting a minority, this group stalks primarily to fulfill sadistic and/or sexual impulses. Stalking serves to gather information for potential acts of violence or sexual assault.

Quoted from:

From verbal to physical violence: the different severity perception of stalking behaviors,

by: Pierluigi Cordellieri, Elena Paoli, Anna Maria Giannini & Giulia Lausi

Life Toughens You

Researchers tend to divide stalking into categories of type and severity. I am sure that it is a good idea to do so for scientists and research, but for the victims, even what would be defined as not-so-dangerous stalking can have extreme effects on a young person, like a young woman in her 20s, whereas an older woman in her 40s might just brush it off.

I barely remember being in my 20s – but I do remember being a lot more emotional than I am today and a lot less tough. Life toughens you, so I am very sure that had what had happened to me over the past years, had that happened when I was in my 20s, I would have died. And I don’t mean to exaggerate. What this group of monsters has done to me, including physical and sexual violations, I would not have been able to get through on my own when I was in my 20s, as I have had to do today and have done, and quite frankly, am the stronger for it.

Of course, had this happened when I was in my 20s, the people responsible would most likely have been beaten to a pulp by some guys I knew back then. So, all in all, the problem would have been quite different, and it would have been solved quickly.

Fake Is All There Is

Unfortunately, lots of people have died, and everyone I have ever known in Denmark who is still alive has turned out to be fake and worthless. I don’t even give a damn about all the outsiders who have participated in this anymore. But the people I have known, upon whom I now wish slow and painful deaths, for them it is evidently more important to keep up the proper façade and be in good standing with police and other authorities as well as gangs of criminals than it is to stand up for someone they know and respect the law.

Leaving that aside—at least for now, I will elaborate on this in the future—my point is that how old you are and how tough you are when targeted by stalkers does matter, too.

So, my extreme descriptions may not apply to your situation as a stalking victim. However, I believe my advice on coping can be helpful to any stalking victim out there. Because no two stalkers are alike, but they do have in common that their actions destroy our lives.

Thanks for reading! I hope you found it valuable and worth your time! Until next time, remember to get your facts straight and that whatever good times you have will never come back as bad times,