November 15th, 2024 / µ

I Am Taking It Step by Step

A reader of this blog wrote me an email with her own story—thank you so much for sharing. Reading and responding to this email made me think a bit about what I had actually done to end my stalking nightmare after I realized in late 2019 that you cannot escape gang stalkers. The five steps below constitute the route I have taken to go from an absolute nightmare to what will hopefully be a lasting solution.

Accept, Reflect, Secure, Plan, Execute

1. Accept

Accept where you are and what has happened to you. Acceptance does not mean liking or bowing your head, though. In this context, it means acknowledging that a problem exists, instead of ignoring or even denying the problem because it is too much to handle emotionally.

The way I see it, whatever happens in your life, accept it, however much it hurts to do so. If you don’t, Freud and his demons will be coming for you one day. You need to acknowledge that a problem, a situation, or a thing exists before you can deal with it. It is that simple.

2. Define

When you have accepted the problem, reflect on what you can do to deal with the situation the problem has led to. In my context, the problem is the stalkers. The situation is what they are doing, how they manipulate, and everything else they do.

POINT: Make it very clear to yourself what the problem is and what situation it causes, so that you target the problem, not its consequences.

Remember, reflection is not narcissism. It is a way to understand and gain perspective, which will help you define your problem and the situation.

Once you have defined the problem and the situation, you will know what you have to deal with. Take as long as you need, write, talk it out, possibly with yourself (make sure you are at home when doing so 😉), work through it, and go back if things change.

3. Secure

Now you need to feel safe and secure, e.g., your income, your job, documentation, your memories, your dog, and your secret recipes. I am sure you get the picture. So, for argument’s sake, let’s keep it simple and say that now you need to secure the premises and make sure you, as a person, are safe.

Do whatever you have to do within the boundaries of your financial limits and the law to ensure your safety.

4. Plan

When you feel safe, you can begin to think about a solution. Feeling safe means you relax, and when you relax, you are rational. Frightened and panic-stricken people never made good plans.

5. Execute‍ ‍

When you have your solution, whatever it may be, let nothing stand in your way except the law, of course.

That’s the Way It Is,

as Céline sings

And then there is the day after the deed, after you have made it through, and you no longer want to listen to Bessie Smith confirm your hard-earned knowledge that nobody knows you because you are down and out. And this is the day when you have to accept that all the things we do in this life will change us.

At the end of the day, we are what life makes us via the life we live. So, accept that the problem might have changed your life as well as how you think, and that the solution you come up with will most likely change your life, too.

From Chaos to Structure

Summing up my suggestion for a structure that will take you from chaos and emotional turmoil to putting an end to a situation:

Accept,

Define,

Secure,

Plan,

Execute!

Good luck!

Thanks for reading! I hope you found it valuable and worth your time! Until next time, remember to get your facts straight and that whatever good times you have won’t come back as bad times,